Masculinity In Guyland And God

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How hard will you try to be a man? One particular angle that interest me in Guyland, by Michael Kimmel and “God,” by Benjamin Nugent, is how men try so hard to fit into the social norms of masculinity, that it causes them to act like something they're not. The reasons that these boys forced themselves into social norms is because they don't want to be rejected and isolated from their group. In one of the chapters “Bro before Hos” Kimmel talks about what the society thinks the definition of masculinity . Kimmel noticed that a lot of guys say that you're not allowed to be “sensitive” or a “emotional”. Kimmel asked a few male students who gave them the idea of what being a man was. A young man named Drew said that his older brothers would…show more content…
In the middle of having sex with Melanie he accidentally calls her the name of one of his fraternity brothers. We find out that the narrator is gay and doesn't even like girls. The narrator tries so hard to be the ideal male that he pretends to like having sex with girls. Him pretending to be something he's not just to please the social norms of masculinity that surround him. Just goes to show effect the effect of the label masculine can do to a person. When he felt as though she would tell everyone and that it would start a rumor around the campus. His first thoughts where “My life is ruined, (252)” and “The ease which my brothers spoke to me...would be withdrawn,(253)” He felt as though him coming out as gay would change people's perception of him. He also felt as though he would be slowly kicked out of the group because he felt as him being gay would make them uncomfortable. This is the main reason that he didn't come out to any of his friend.In both cases the guys are doing something just to please the idea of masculinity. They are hiding their true selves to fit in and please other people. Even though they clearly feel a certain way about something they would rather be accepted then challenge the people around them. Ive noticed alot of guys changing their personalities to fit into the ideal “Man” so they wouldn't get teased. One of the biggest reasons that men…show more content…
In one story that he talks about a group of guys who try to rape this innocent girl. Some of the boys didn't want to do it, but, they felt as though they would ridiculed if they were to disagree. In this case one person did express how they felt. He knew this was a serious situation and he felt like it was wrong. After he expressed how he felt about the situation. Some of the other boys started to be on his side in saying it is wrong. Some of the boys probably wanted to stand up for themselves the whole time, but they were probably too afraid of being isolated from the group to say anything. If that one person didn't stand up for what they believed in then a lot of the other boys would have followed and raped the girl. In this case the outcome changed because he decided to express himself instead of holding in how he felt. In these stories a character is changes or almost changes himself by becoming more masculine to fit in so that they can be accepted by their peers. In our society a lot of young men have categories that they must follow in order to be considered “Masculine.” Some of the qualities are that you must be tough and aggressive. But to be a man has nothing to do with the emotions that you feel. When you have roles for a specific gender it just causes people to feel as though being different is odd. If a man feels like being sensitive and being

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