Why Don T We Listen Better Summary

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In the book Why Don’t We Listen Better by James C. Petersen the skill of listening is evaluated in order to teach people how to build relationships through communication. Petersen (2007) begins the book by suggesting that people believe that they listen to each other; however, the truth is that what is being said may not be heard. He believes that it is because of the lack of listening that confusion and pain are caused (Petersen, 2007). In order to improve communication in relationships, he suggests a set of listening and talking skills throughout the book (Petersen, 2007). The author uses the analogy of the stomach, heart, and head to accentuate the importance of listening (Petersen, 2007). He suggests that the stomach is where our emotions are contained, the heart helps us to acknowledge how we feel, and the head is where our thoughts and emotions are put into words (Petersen, 2007). Through the development of emotions, there are two levels of communication that we achieve (Petersen, 2007). In level one we begin to exchange information with others (Petersen, 2007). It is suggested that in this level there is a “yearn for personal connection” and the exchanges that do occur…show more content…
It has taught me that there are many barriers that can prevent us from being good communicators. In counseling it is important to understand that the goal of talking is to determine our feelings and to share them with someone (Petersen, 2007). In order to successfully share our feelings, we must make sure that we are clear about our own ideas (Petersen, 2007). One important thought that Petersen (2007) presents is that “stomach talk is not spilling your guts” (Petersen, 2007, p. 77). This notion is something that is new to me. In order to begin to become a successful talker, I plan to continue to research how to be an effective communicator. I would like to attend seminars on the subject as well as read

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