Personal Narrative: Waking Up

618 Words3 Pages
Waking up, in my opinion, is never fun. Absolutely everyone knows it. I think it's fundamental, like if you woke up in the middle of nowhere with absolutely no memories and only in ratty jeans and a Chicago Cubs hoodie, you would still have your utter hatred of mornings. Which is beyond lucky for me, since I did wake up in the middle of nowhere with absolutely no memories and only in ratty jeans and a Chicago Cubs hoodie. The knowledge that waking up was a universally loathed phenomenon wasn't much, but it was nearly all I had, as far as beliefs. Not that I had much in the way of material possessions either. I sighed, scanning the foliage or the dirt for something - anything, really. There was a patch of clumpy grass that looks like…show more content…
The other half - which probably got me into this ordeal in the first place - insisted that I pick it up. I oblige. As soon as my fingers brush the surface, I pause, waiting for metal claws to come out of the mulch-like ground and lob off my hand. Nothing happens. I pulled out the small rectangle quickly (just in case). When I looked at it, I see - what I'm hoping is - my reflection. It's mildly surprising. The reflection was dark, but I could still vaguely make out colors. Teakwood skin, black hair, brown eyes, and - wow, I had a nice jaw, I must have picked up a ton of chicks. That was to say, before I was an amnesiac…show more content…
Someone was listening, which meant I could get ahold of 911, which means I can get help, which means that. . . at least that there's a different fate for me than rooting for the Cubs alone in the woods with no recollection of anything (much less how I got there). "Hello? Is someone there? I need help, it's-" "Forgotten me already, Ma-ar-co? I am wounded," the woman's voice deadpanned. "It is Siri." Oh. "Are you a robot?" I ask, not looking forward to hearing the inevitable reply. She responds immediately. "I am Siri, an intelligent personal assistant designed by Apple Incorporated. I am-" "A robot," I finish, putting forth a Herculean effort not to sigh again. "-capable of sending messages, creating schedules, adding dates to calendars, assessing locations, placing phone calls, and more. I understand natural speeches and their patterns, and only ask questions if I require more information to complete the assigned task." Assessing locations, I repeat in my head. "What is. . . " I pause, correcting my phrasing. "Where am I now?" "'Where are Ü Now'; a song by artist Ju-" "I don't think that's what I meant. Where's my
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