David Sheff's Beautiful Boy

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Underlying Personality In David Sheff’s book, Beautiful Boy, the conflicting sides of Nic force David to create two different responses to Nic’s behavior causing him to exhibit contradictory feelings and actions. There are two sides of Nic that create conflict in David’s approach to Nic’s addiction. There is the positive Nic who is kind and caring towards his family and has goals and plans for the future. This Nic takes care of his siblings, tells them stories and has fun. He is a great student and an excellent writer. He spends his free time surfing, swimming and being active. This is the real version of Nic, the one that’s not clouded by drugs and pain. David clings to this version of his son throughout his addiction because…show more content…
David is in disbelief of his son’s addiction, he wonders, “How can both the Nics, the loving and considerate and generous one. And the self-obsessed and self-destructive one, be the same person?” (pg. 96). David describes Nic as creative, confident, individual, cautious, generous and considerate (chapter 1). This is the positive Nic, this is the version of Nic that every parent wants their child to be when they grow up. However, David has the illogical belief that since he and Nic had been so close, Nic would tell him if he was starting to experiment with drugs and alcohol. This is not a realistic expectation because kids are programed to want to please their parents and no parent would be proud to hear that of their child. Throughout Nic’s experience with drugs he gets progressively more moody and irresponsible. Nic describes himself as “arrogant, insecure and immature” (1, Life After Meth). David writes these qualities off as Nic being a teenager and growing up. This negative version of Nic leads David to be extremely angry and creates a lot of resentment in their relationship. He is unable to rely on Nic to be a constant in his life not to mention the lives of his other children. Each time David sees or hears from his son he has to wonder whether he will receive the positive and helpful Nic or the negative and high Nic. Nic’s actions during his…show more content…
“He [Nic] pulls out a joint, lights it, and passes it to me. I stare a minute. I still smoke pot, albeit rarely…But this is different. And yet I accept the joint, thinking -rationalizing- that it’s not unlike a father in a previous generation sharing a beer with his seventeen year old son, a harmless, bonding moment” (pg. 90). In the moment of sharing a joint with Nic, David is contradicting each and every piece of advice he ever gave to his son about drugs. This not only gives Nic an excuse to continue his use but also gives him the sense that he isn’t doing anything wrong. David is clinging to the good version of his son, the son who is simply going through a teenage phase. David is so desperate to maintain his previous relationship with Nic that he ignores the reality that Nic is already an addict. At this point he needs to get help in order to live a clean and healthy life. David has the best intentions in trying to connect with his son however, the idea that establishing a father and son bond would prevent Nic’s addiction is misguided. David and Nic had a strong bond in the first place, which didn’t prevent any of Nic’s past drug use. David needed to realize the severity of his son’s condition and what his actions taught his son before taking that
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