Melisa Red Line In MEMPHIS: A Dramatic Crime Story

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MELISA RED LINE IN MEMPHIS is a dramatic crime story with a very relevant topic in today’s society regarding racial relationships between White cops and Black citizens. What makes this story stand out is that the cop in question is a female. This feels refreshing. It’s nice to see a strong, central female protagonist drive the story. The goal is clear and the stakes are very high. There’s a solid inciting event when Melisa shoots the wrong person, igniting public protest. There are themes about trust and reconnecting. All of these elements have merit. It’s definitely a good setup for a story with conflict, tension, moral choices, and character transformation. There’s a three-act structure and for the most part the story is goal-oriented. Getting Valejo and proving her innocence drives the action. Moreover, the protagonist, Melisa has personal issues and conflict. Her…show more content…
There are several concerns about the script that are worth discussing. This includes: plot believability, tone, tension, some more character development, as well as dialogue. First, the plot is somewhat similar to some recent true-life events. In fact, it might be “too” similar to the events. The idea that there’s a witness who claims that he heard the victim say, “Don’t shoot” is based on the Michael Brown case in Ferguson. Some may see this as a bit sensational. Consider the idea of changing the wording. While the plot begins like a story about racial profiling and the horrors and injustice that can occur when a cop is accused of being racist, the plot drifts from this goal. It turns more into a story about catching Valejo. It’s not about exploring Melisa’s inner struggle with shooting the wrong person. There’s more room to explore this: how it affects her relationship with Jason and men; how it affects Jason; how it affects her supporting her family; can she get a job; and will anyone hire her

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